1 January 2013

The Worst Films of 2012

I initially thought about publishing my ten worst films of the year, but despite the five worst being immediately identifiable there were a further thirteen films I couldn't decide upon to fill those final five spots, including one Oscar winner and another Oscar nominee. So it made sense to limit this list to five. So here they are... the five worst films I saw that were released in the UK in 2012, presented in alphabetical order (but if you really must know, The Devil Inside is hands down the winner here):

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
This is a film with the potential to actually be quite fun, subverting history in an entertaining and schlocky way. But instead it's a massive failure, ending up a tedious half-assed mess. A combination of poor pacing, nonsensical editing, awful CGI and no concept of fun made Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter one of the most frustrating films to watch in 2012. An interesting idea epically squandered. [Read my full review here]

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part Two
The Twilight films are an easy target I know, but I've readily watched them all and accepted them for what they are at face value, knowing full well who the target audience is and that it's not me. But that shouldn't stop me pointing out that this final film really is a poor example of filmmaking. Yes the story is risible and just plain weird at times (blame the source), but very little in the film seems to work, leaving the viewer exasperated. It's all so steeped in bad soap opera, the acting included (yet Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart can act, see Cosmopolis or On the Road), that it's hard to swallow. It's just content with existing and knowing that there will be millions who love it, quality be damned. On the plus side it is marginally better than Part One, which is cataclysmically bad. Now can someone explain why a film with more beheadings than the average samurai film was only classified a 12A in the UK!?

The Devil Inside
Quite simply the most incompetent piece of fimmaking I saw in 2012. A "horror" film lacking any sort of horror or scares. A film where logic plays no part. A film that makes you wish the "found footage" concept hadn't been invented (whereas this year Chronicle reminded how effective it can be). I don't remember the last time I came across a film that doesn't have an ending and genuinely gives the appearance that the filmmakers just gave up three quarters of the way through because they realised they were making something absolutely awful. Avoid The Devil Inside at all costs. [Read my full review here]

Silent Hill: Revelation
It's a sad state of affairs when the computer game your film is based on is actually scarier. That was the case with the first Silent Hill film, which although visually interesting failed at recreating the atmosphere that made the game so effective. A sequel could set things right, right? No chance here. Silent Hill: Revelation is a totally unscary mess of CGI and confusing storytelling. Pretty much nothing in it works apart from a couple of interesting visual concepts, but even they fall apart in execution. This really is a bad film, worse than the first, and if the opportunity to watch it presents itself, run, far away.

Taken 2
This was the one sequel released in 2012 that was never needed. The first Taken is a pretty bad film despite some fun moments, but Taken 2 just seems to exist to multiply the badness, through stunningly incredulous and dumb plotting, editing that makes the toned down action sequences incoherent, and more cheesiness than is healthy. Liam Neeson isn't even particularly good in it. How a film like Taken 2 can make $365m worldwide whilst Dredd, the best action film of the year, only made $30m, depresses the hell out of me. [Read my full review here] 


Note 1: I know this list is almost entirely comprised of horror / horror-themed films, but I've seen very little from that genre that's impressed me this year - The Innkeepers probably being the best.

Note 2: also read The Top 10 Films of 2012 and The Most Over-Rated Films of 2012. 

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